English language is not only phonetically inconsistent, it’s also somewhat silly.

Read from a Facebook note . . .


Laughter is pronounced “lafter” while Slaughter is pronounced “sloter”.

Sow, a female hog is pronounced “sou” while Sow which is to scatter seed is pronounced as “so’.


There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in hamburger; neither

apple or pine in pineapple. And while no one knows what is

in a hotdog, you can be pretty sure it isn’t canine.


English muffins were not invented in England nor French

fries in France.


(Picture from: http://rishikajain.com/2012/03/01/humor-english-is-a-crazy-language/)

Sweetmeats are candies, while sweetbreads, which aren’t

sweet, are meat.


We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes,

we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are

square, and guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.


And why is it that writers write, but fingers don’t fing,

grocers don’t groce, and hammers don’t ham?


If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn’t the plural of

booth, beeth? One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, two meese?

Is cheese the plural of choose? One mouse, 2 mice. One louse,

2 lice. One house, 2 hice?


If teachers taught, why didn’t preachers praught?


If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian



Why do people recite at a play, and play at a recital?

Ship by truck or car and send cargo by ship? Have noses

that run and feet that smell? Park on driveways and drive

on parkways?


How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a

wise man and a wise guy are opposites?


How can the weather be hot as heck one day and cold as

heck another? When a house burns up, it burns down. You fill

in a form by filling it out and an alarm clock goes off by

going on. You get in and out of a car, yet you get on and

off a bus. When the stars are out, they are visible, but when

the lights are out, they are invisible.


And why, when I wind up my watch, I start it, but when I

wind up this essay, I end it?


English is a silly language … it doesn’t know if it is

coming or going!!!


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